A family was born.

The story of our birth: mommy, daddy & son

I don’t necessarily believe that marriage makes a family, nor that the birth of a child defines it. But I truly believe that going through experiences together, in sickness and in health holding each other’s hand is what really makes a family to be a family.

And my family was born on the 4th of April!

Let me give you a bit of context. Actually, to be honest, I just want to keep these details written down somewhere forever because I’m too afraid not to forget them one day. It was a rainy, cold evening of April, 03.04.2023, when me and my husband realized that our precious little baby decided he was ready to meet the World. We were desperately scared at the beginning, as the pregnancy was just in its early 35th week and we did not know the complications the birth might come with for our little baby.

However, when the Universe decides something, you can’t hold it back. So, the beginning of labor was there, loud and clear, with contractions every 5 minutes and with the water that broke right at midnight. And then we decided to go to the hospital.

I remember outside it was raining, my husband was so nervous and excited. His only focus was to entertain me, take away my fear, and help me open my heart and let the experience just flow. He just wanted to make the best of it from the very beginning, playing loud music on our way to the hospital, making jokes one after another, I remember laughing so hard in the car from times to times between contractions and a few waves of release crying with huge tears because I didn’t know what to expect once we arrive at the hospital.

Well, and then we found out. It was 1 o’clock in the night, and the doctor said loud and clear: your baby will be born TODAY - 04.04.2023.

Once I realized this, I moved my focus right away from fear and despair, to mindfulness, calmness, and deep concentration to make whatever it takes to help our baby to come to this World supported, trusted, and loved by both his parents. And so did my amazing husband!

While I was changing and getting ready to go to the delivery room, my husband rushed to bring my midwife, Camelia Irimia. In 20 min they were at the hospital, and he stood by my side every single second. The midwife had a separate room from where she was monitoring the evolution of my labor, and I got to spend the most precious moments of my life alone with my husband.

It was a long, exhausting night of painful contractions every 5 minutes. However, I only remember the magical connection me and John had the entire time. The physical, emotional, and moral support he gave me the whole labor is out of this world. He made me laugh when the struggle was real and he took away my pain gently, with so much love, just by being there and trusting me and our son. We watched movies, we listened to music, we laughed at jokes, we were breathing together, and started acting like real parents: making decisions together, as a true team.

As the hours passed by, the night was over, the contractions still there every 5 minutes, no hesitation. The whole time, I was completely connected to my baby, to my husband, and to myself. I didn’t let any negative emotions come into our way. No fear, no despair, no anxiety. Just focusing on my breath, on the moves of our baby, and on the greatest purpose I had in my life of them all: delivering our baby safely, bravely, and in peace.

Never in my life have I been so connected to the present moment as I was during those hours. I’m pretty sure I met Nirvana that night, as focusing on my breath was the main thing I was doing. My mind was empty of everything I knew before, resetting my whole system to 0: that’s the moment when a mother is born. The ultimate connection to my instincts, to my body, and to every cell in my body. Every time I tented to lose focus, I was meeting my husband’s eyes and his loving looks, gentle touches, and soft kisses covered me in so much peace and gratefulness, anchoring me in the most important mission of my life: calmly delivering our baby.

A night and a day of feelings: despair — when realizing the baby was coming, fear — of unknown, decisions — to put all negatives aside and focus on transmitting to our baby lots of trust and positive vibes, pain — no need to explain, support, motivation, power, strength, stubbornness, love, love, love! And after all that, I’ve met the border between life and the unknown, the only truly scary part of the whole experience: the last push! This was the hardest moment of them all. My doctor and my midwife’s exchange of looks filled me with worries. This moment scared the death out of me and made me think for a second if I really want to push and find out what’s behind the border. And then I looked at John, he nodded YES with so much power and trust in me, lovingly petting my forehead and swiping away my fear, so I gathered all my strength, and gave my final push. And there he was, crying from the top of his little lungs: Filip Gabriel Șandru was born together with our bare new, magical family.

My body was filled with peace, gratefulness, happiness, joy, release, surrender, bliss, light, and so, so, so much love for these two precious boys I have in my life. One carefully chosen and the other one created from scratch. A baby is not accidentally growing right under his mother’s heart, because even after birth, he is rooted there so strongly. Every cell in my body connected to this tiny human and to his father that was there for me in every shape I needed.

I strongly advise families to be together at the birth of their child. This is a one in a lifetime opportunity to truly be there for another in every possible form in such a short amount of time. For me, this was the strongest I DO, not spoken, not written, but felt so strongly deep in my heart. This experience was for sure something I don’t know if I’ll meet again in my life. It made us so much stronger as a couple, but most importantly, it proved to us that we are going to make the best team as parents to little Filip.

In the end, I would describe my birth experience as being the most complex, wonderful, and beautiful experience of my life, as it represents the birth of our beautiful family and of our sweetest baby boy: Filip Gabriel. Now I understand why a baby is growing and developing for months right under a mother’s heart. It’s because even after the child is born, her chest will never be empty again.

Welcome to the World, Filip! Your parents love you and we know you know it, because WE WERE THERE!